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Wednesday, January 15, 2014

Treatment Plan | The Secret

I've been applying positive thinking to my life every day for the past week.

I find things or instances that make me feel joy and I remember them over and over again. It makes me feel happier all the time. I don't feel like I'm waiting for the next thing to make me happy, because it's me that making myself happy on a more frequent basis. I'm not waiting. I'm experiencing it NOW. Positive thinking is what is getting me into the groove of making myself better.

Positive thinking works like a charm when you let it.

My newest experiment focuses on the Law of Attraction. Normally I wake when my fingers are on fire and I immediately think in my head how painful it is. Then I worry about how long it will take for it to feel better. Then I worry if my hand and arm will ever be normal again.

Yesterday I tried something different. I switched my thinking. I got up and smoked and ran into the hot shower. As the water was getting warm I told myself that it was already feeling better. I got into the shower and felt the hot water cascade down my neck to my elbow and to my fingers. I put a joyful smile on my face and I thought over and over in my head, "It's feeling remarkably great already!"

Some call it positive thinking. I call it the Law of Attraction.

How does it work? 
  1. Envision what you want. Get a clear picture. Got it? 
  2. You know that feeling you get when you are in love? There's that moment when you love someone so much that you feel extreme joy just by looking at that person. Bottle that moment and use it to fill your heart with that extreme joy at this very moment. Feel it. Hold onto that feeling.
  3. Now using only positive words tell the universe what you want. Tell it what you will have. Say it like you already have it. Then feel thankful for it.
  4. Do this several times a day until you glow with your inner light so much that people comment on how much you're glowing on the outside. Then glow more brightly.
  5. Enjoy what you've attracted and be ever more mindful of what you think.
The Secret says that it's possible to get anything that's important to you this way. If you want good health then you have to envision yourself healthy and you have to believe that you are even if you're not at this very moment. 

So, right now I'm telling the universe that I am very thankful for my health. I've attracted good health by simply believing it to be so.

And, at this moment…this very moment when I should be in hideous pain while typing…I feel great!

Thursday, January 9, 2014

Wellness Journal | Treatment Plan

patient note

first day I've been able to type in five days due to extreme pain 24/7.


left hand fingers burn and are numb at same time
elbow pain has worsened
migraine headaches continue
sensitivity to light continues
dizziness yesterday in the shower

current treatment

daily meditation
klonopin (.5mg morning and night)
marijuana as pain and anxiety control
organic diet
juicing 2-3 times a week
more fermented foods in my diet

therapy needed

finger exercises
light 1 lb. weight exercises
meditative yoga
meditation twice a day
mirror exercises

diet changes needed

complete alcohol elimination
no more meat products including seafood and eggs (feta cheese will be the one thing I will not give up)
15 day detox and daily acv

Wednesday, January 8, 2014

Wellness Journal | Severe Pain Will Take Over If I Let It

The last five days were hell. I was in so much pain 24/7. 

I smoked a lot, but it barely touched the pain. 

Every time I lifted something with my left hand I was sure I would drop it, so by the second day I didn't bother holding much. I tested out my theory a couple of times a day…but I couldn't do anything with my hand. I couldn't…and it was hell.

Is this how I want to spend the rest of my days? Only using my left hand minorly? I can't lose the function in my arm. I just can't. I'm a writer. I need to feel of the keys under my fingertips to write. I need the noise, the pattern that the keys make as they tat, tat, tat across the screen. It fuels my writing.

When I think that I may lose that it deeply saddens me. 

It's easy to feel defeated with this disorder. I find myself crying at least once a day. It's not that I'm feeling sorry for myself. It's just that I'm so very tired of the pain. It's exhausting. I don't sleep well at night and I spend my days trying to look for distractions, or at the very least, something that will make my heart laugh. I think that's the best thing one can do when in a chronic pain situation.

Look for the good.

So, every morning I wake up next to a beautiful man. I thank the lucky stars for him. He makes me feel treasured and tortured all in the same breath. He reminds me to feel the good moments so that they can carry over into the bad. And that's a beautiful feeling. It's a beautiful feeling to feel alive even when parts of me feel dead.

Channeling that energy helps me stay positive and not get carried away to the dark side of pain. The dark will creep up on you, attack you when you least suspect it and sink it's teeth into your neck. Like a vicious dog it's intent is to tear your sanity to pieces. Your job is not to let it. 

So, I spend my days…
breathing. meditating. losing myself in music. laughing. enjoying the feel of the sun on my face. and remembering to put my feet in the grass.

Tuesday, January 7, 2014

Treatment Plan | Sex for Patients Lacking Dopamine

What do a tardive dyskinesia patient's low levels of dopamine mean when it comes to sex? Why is sex so beneficial to the treatment?

First we should examine again that tardive dyskinesia is a disorder that has low levels of dopamine receptors, what dopamine is, and how sex as a treatment helps tardive dyskinesia symptoms. 

What is dopamine? Dopamine is one of the chemical signals that pass information from one neuron to the next in the tiny spaces between them. When it is released from the first neuron, it floats into the space (the synapse) between the two neurons, and it bumps against receptors for it on the other side that then send a signal down the receiving neuron. That sounds very simple, but when you scale it up from a single pair of neurons to the vast networks in your brain, it quickly becomes complex. The effects of dopamine release depend on where it’s coming from, where the receiving neurons are going and what type of neurons they are, what receptors are binding the dopamine (there are five known types), and what role both the releasing and receiving neurons are playing. [source]

Dopamine receptors are typically stable, however sharp (and sometimes prolonged) increases or decreases in dopamine levels (via stimulants or antipsychotics mainly) can downregulate (reduce the numbers of) or upregulate (increase the numbers of) dopamine receptors. 

For example, dopamine plays a big role in starting movement, and the destruction of dopamine neurons in an area of the brain called the substantia nigra is what produces the symptoms of Parkinson’s disease (a sister of Tardive Dyskinesia). Dopamine also plays an important role as a hormone, inhibiting prolactin to stop the release of breast milk. Back in the mesolimbic pathway, dopamine can play a role in psychosis, and many antipsychotics for treatment of schizophrenia target dopamine. Dopamine is involved in the frontal cortex inexecutive functions like attention. In the rest of the body, dopamine is involved in nausea, in kidney function, and in heart function.

So dopamine has to do with addiction, whether to cupcakes or cocaine. It has to do with lust and love. It has to do with milk. It has to do with movement, motivation, attention, psychosis. Dopamine plays a role in all of these. But it is none of them, and we shouldn’t want it to be. Its complexity is what makes it great. It shows us what, with a single molecule, the brain can do. [Source]

After orgasm, the body increases prolactin which counteracts dopamine. Prolactin provides the body with sexual gratification after sexual acts: The hormone counteracts the effect of dopamine, which is responsible for sexual arousal. This is thought to cause the sexual refractory period. The amount of prolactin can be an indicator for the amount of sexual satisfaction and relaxation.

One study examined 12 healthy women using a positron emission tomography (PET) scanner while they were being stimulated by their partners. Brain changes were observed and compared between states of rest, sexual stimulation, faked orgasm, and actual orgasm. "Differences were reported on the brain changes associated with men and women during stimulation. However, the same changes in brain activity were observed in both sexes in which the brain regions associated with behavioral control, fear and anxiety shut down. Regarding these changes, Holstege said in an interview with The Times, "What this means is that deactivation, letting go of all fear and anxiety, might be the most important thing, even necessary, to have an orgasm." [source]

Conclusion: Sex is very important to the treatment of Tardive Dyskinesia. It helps by shutting down the dopamine receptors and increasing the prolactin which de-stresses the body thereby helping with symptom control.