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Saturday, June 28, 2014

Wellness Journal | Off the Meds

Please note that this is a repost from my former blog, Guinea Pig.
The last week has been hell. My arm was in so much pain that I succumbed and took a pain pill. I just couldn't take the pain anymore. Marijuana helps with the pain, but when we're out of good quality medical grade, something has to do. It was stupid, stupid, stupid of me to take the pill. Yes, my pain is better, but it's my stomach that's on fire now. So, THIS is why I choose marijuana over pharmaceuticals. Marijuana never makes my stomach so ill that I can't sleep.

Pharmaceuticals create customers, they don't cure.

I'm going through the process of retraining my brain. I'm off of the Klonopins. It's probably why my week was so crappy. I'm still having a really hard time going to sleep when I want to. Last night I got up out of bed and I read a bit until I was so exhausted that I fell asleep when my head hit the pillow. I know that those meds were poisoning my body. I can tell. The last time I stopped taking anti-anxiety meds my body did the same song and dance. I can feel it going through withdrawals.

I'm doing my best to stay healthy during this time. When my body is in pain and I'm trying to detox the medications from my body, I do things like drink ACV and make my marshmallow root tea. Almost every time I've gone off meds I've noticed that my body's immune system goes down and it's protesting louder than at a rally to protest government conspiracies. My allergies get worse. My body starts to feel depraved, angry with me for even ingesting the poison in my body in the first place.

It's a battle of wills that's going on in my mind. I know that pharmaceuticals are bad for me, but yet I take them anyway due to four decades of governmental propaganda that proclaims that western medicine cures all. I know in my head that western medicine has done much in the wonders of surgery, but at what cost? It's my theory that our bodies, our very DNA have been changed by pharmaceuticals. Think about it. If GMOs can alter our DNA, then why wouldn't a chemical spliced with a plant derivative do the same?

So, I hear myself and I believe my words. I know, after so much research into the world of nutrition and psychiatric pharmaceuticals (the worst kind) that I'm right. I know that pharmaceuticals are poison. I know that, and, yet, I still took a pain pill two days ago... It pains my soul to hear it and see it written here. I didn't live up to my own expectations and I've disappointed my own self. While the pain was excruciating, I don't think that a day of no pain was worth the trauma that it does to the rest of my body the day after.

I felt weak yesterday. I felt hungover and tired and sad. Gawd, so very sad. Which brings me to another reason why we shouldn't ingest these medications. It does affect our brain. As someone with a brain disorder, as someone who once had a mental disorder, as someone who has an anxiety disorder...well, that's just HUGE. I don't want these meds to cloud my mind. Don't you ever wonder how Alzheimer's became such a big thing? It's a big thing now because our food, our medications, our air, our water are all poisoning our minds and bodies.

It saddens me that most american people think that the psychiatric industry is a wonder. Yeah, it's a wonder alright...it's a wonder that people swallow their meds like good little patients because the propaganda for Big Pharma in this country is hardcore. Try getting through one hour of regular television without seeing a pharmaceutical ad. I don't have cable, but I do have a subscription to Hulu Plus that I share with another person. If I had to buy it myself, I wouldn't, because they, too, have pharmaceutical ads (hence why I don't watch it often). There are so many ads that remind us that the government cares about us. So many ads that proclaim that we can get better by quickly swallowing an easy, peasy pill.

There's research out there that suggests that pills are damaging our bodies. The studies that say that they poison our minds as well are just not out there yet. GMO studies are taking forever to come out, but they're shocking the american people nonetheless. What do you think will happen when Big Pharma has to submit their studies to an independent researcher? Right now the corporations are doing the studies which means their data is corrupt because there's nobody policing them.

If we don't take a stand and boycott pharmaceuticals two things will happen. One is that we will die. Two is that Big Pharma and the government will win. I refuse to be a guinea pig for anyone anymore. I choose what goes into my body. It may be an inner battle some days, but I will win if I remember that there may be a lot of freedoms that have taken away from us, the American People, but I have one choice left that I can still have control over.

I won't make the same mistake again by taking a pharmaceutical and I'll say it again...

Pharmaceuticals don't make cures, they create customers.

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